Shipwrecked
by SteveB2016
Summary: Canta. The most feared Pirate Ship that ever sailed the Seven Seas! Feared by sailors and explorers alike...or...so they like to think. The real truth is that Mami, Tomomi, Rina, Haruna, Kashiyuka, A-Chan and Nocchi are just seven pirates. Seven pirates who try and fail (often amusingly) to complete their quests to find the "Cookie Jar."
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

A large ship rocked on the choppy waters of the Pacific Ocean. The occupants were seven young women. All of them, Pirates as can be told by the Jolly Roger flying on the mast in the crows nest. There were several Cannons placed at the wooden railings on the edge of the deck. The name "Canta" was engraved on both sides of the bow in large gold letters. A young woman was perched in the Crow's Nest. She was holding a telescope to her eye, looking out in the distance.

"Land ahoy!" called Kashiyuka from the crows nest.

The captain, complete with a parrot on her shoulder and a wooden leg ambled down from the navigation wheel onto the deck. To her left, a younger, rather weedy looking woman was vomiting overboard.

"Pull yourself together, Rina," said Mami the captain. "Whoever heard of a seasick pirate."

Rina looked at the captain. Her face was as white as the sails. She coughed and lurched once more, vomiting overboard again.

"Haruna!" she yelled at another. Haruna was second in command and was currently poring over a map in front of her. The little wooden ship she was using had stopped near an Island called, "Catfish Island." However, unaware to her. The map was upside down.

"You're in charge," barked Mami. She then turned to three others.

"Tomomi, Nocchi, A-Chan," she called to three others. All of them cleaning the deck of the ship. "You're coming with me."

They stood up and followed her to a small rowing boat. They swung it out of the ship and climbed in.

"Why can't I come?" asked Rina. She had recovered and her face was a shade of seaweed green.

"Because until you've learned to row and vomit at the same time, you're no good for going ashore," replied Mami.

In the row boat, Tomomi, A-Chan and Nocchi were imitating Rina vomiting and rowing at the same time.

Rina gave them a very rude hand gesture at them.

"Up yours!" cried the Parrot on Mami's shoulder.

Mami turned to look at Rina. Rina was hiding her hands behind her back, trying to look innocent.

"I hope that's a rag in your hand," said Mami. She turned around and went to the little row boat.

"Stop playing with that winch Tomomi," said Mami. "You'll break it."

She heaved herself with difficulty into the boat. It was slowly winched down into the sea.

"This ship better be here when I get back!" she called as the boat hit the water.

"If it isn't you won't be able to punish us," called Haruna after her. However, the little row boat was too far away for Mami to hear her.

"Quick," said Rina. "Let's become the most fearsome Pirate's while she's gone."

"Oh yeah!" asked Kashiyuka who'd just climbed down the crow's nest. "We're going to get far with a seasick Pirate and a Navigator who can't tell what side of the map is which."

"Well," asked Haruna, brushing off her comment. "What do you suggest we do?"

"Oh I don't know," replied Kashiyuka. She grabbed Haruna's Admiral's hat and stuck it on her head. "Rum."

"Heave!" cried Mami. "Heave!"

Tomomi and A-Chan pulled the oars hard. Nocchi sat at the rear, steering with the rudder.

"Come on!" she called. "Put your backs into it!"

They rowed harder, pulling with all their strength.

"Ark!" cawed Mami's parrot. "Weaklings."

The little boat approached the land. Mami stepped out on the soft white sand. The others dropped what they were doing and followed her.

"Do you know where we're going Captain?" asked Tomomi.

"Of course," she replied.

She dug into her pocket and pulled a tatty rag. She unfolded it and glanced at it. On it was an ink drawing of the island they were on. It showed a dotted line, with a number next to it.

"Follow me," commanded Mami.

She began walking across the Island, counting her steps. The map read "25". She stopped and consulted the map once more. It said to walk East for 15 steps, this was followed by an "X."

Mami followed the maps instructions.

She stopped on the "X" on the map.

"Here we are," she said. "Give me the shovel."

Nocchi passed her the shovel. Mami stuck it into the ground. She balanced her wooden leg on the sand and used her good leg to press the shovel into the sand.

She dug furiously until there was a clink of metal on metal. She had found the chest. The others bent down to help her. They uncovered it and lifted it from the hole. They dusted it so that it glinted in the sun. Mami took the key and unlocked it. She opened it carefully. It was empty, save for a small paper note that simply read, "I.O.U. Some treasure."

Mami was furious. She kicked the chest in anger, but achieved nothing but an excruciating pain in her good leg.

"Damn it!" she cursed. She stood up and punched Tomomi full on in the face. She fell in one.

"Damn you," she said. "It's all your fault!"

"How is it my fault?" asked Tomomi.

"You rowed us here!" answered Mami in a fit of rage.

"I owe you!" she cried. "I owe you this shovel. Which I'll shove up your ass!"

She kicked the chest again, but only made the pain in her foot worse. Nocchi quickly grabbed the IOU note before the chest was kicked again. She grabbed it and pulled a small leather pouch. She opened it to reveal a small stack of paper about the same size. All of them read the same words, "IOU Some Treasure."

"Come on!" cried Mami. "Back to the ship!"

She turned on her heel and stormed off back to the boat. The others followed her, rather reluctantly.

Back on the ship, the party was in full swing. Haruna, Rina and Kashiyuka were dancing around a large dining room each carrying a small bottle of Rum. The tables had been pushed back against the walls. A gramophone was playing loud, heavy dance music and there was a disco ball rotating on the ceiling creating glittery dots all over the walls. The door banged open. Mami stood in the doorway. The others stopped dancing and turned to look at her.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning dawned bright. Empty bottles of Whiskey and Rum littered the floor. The shiny disco ball was on the floor. It had rolled into a corner and sat motionless. Around the room were the crew of the Canta. All seven of them had passed out. Mami was laying in heap on the table. Her wooden leg and fell off and was laying a few feet from where it should be.

Rina and Haruna were laying together in the corner. Their heads rested on each other as they slept peacefully. Nocchi was slumped into a chair, drooling slightly. Next to her was A-Chan, who was also drooling. Kashiyuka was sleeping on the floor. She was hugging a cushion that she had stolen from the chair Nocchi was sleeping on.

The door to the bathroom opened. Tomomi exited. She was tousle-haired and yawned widely. She also had a blinding headache. She walked across the room and stepped over Kashiyuka. She picked a bottle of water from the table and downed it in one. She then turned to look around at the scene. It was complete carnage.

Quietly, she began to clear up the mess that had been made. The chinking of the bottles together gave her a headache. She was careful to avoid it. She picked up as many as she could and carried them carefully to an empty wooden box. She placed them inside carefully. Suddenly, she dropped them and they all fell on top of each other. The din was incredible. Many of them smashed. All of the occupants awoke with a start.

"Whozair?" asked Mami before she could get the words out. She sat upright but then wished she hadn't. She put her hand on her head in pain.

"Oh my god," she said. "My head. It feels like there's a Frenchman living in it."

She sat up and looked around.

"It looks like there's one living here too," she said.

"What?" asked Nocchi, who too had woken up from the din. "Are you saying that all Frenchmen are dirty people?"

"Ark!" cawed Mami's parrot. "Viva La France!"

"Shut up!" said Mami rubbing her forehead. "Don't ask me complicated questions now."

She sat on the edge of the table. She tried to stand up. She swayed violently and fell down onto the table again.

"Give me some water," said Mami.

Tomomi threw her a bottle of water. Mami uncorked it and downed it in one. She then threw it into the wooden box. It was a direct hit. It landed in the box in one movement.

"Hey," said Rina. "Chuck me some too."

"Get it yourself," replied Mami. "I'm your captain. Not your servant."

Tomomi exited the cabin. She blinked in the morning sunlight. Her hangover causing a blinding headache. She looked out and saw a large set of palm trees. Looking around she could see the sea behind her and an island in front of her. She walked to the side of the ship and looked over the edge. She could see white sand below. It seemed as if the ship had run aground. She looked out over the bow of the ship once more. There was a large army of Tribal soldiers. All of them were waggling their spears and getting very angry.

"Um ka!" said the one in front.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"Um ka! Fun ga ha ji ku ma," he said again.

"Mami!" yelled Tomomi. "Get out here."

The door flung open. Mami hobbled out securing her wooden leg onto the remainder of her real one.

"Quit yelling," said Mami. "I got a headache."

She ambled to Tomomi.

"What do you want?" she asked curtly.

Tomomi pointed to the group of Tribesman looking at them, with their weapons raised.

"Ah!" said Mami looking at them. There were about fifty of them.

"Um ka!" said the leader. "Tu um ka!"

"Who's Um ka?" asked Mami.

"Tu um ka!" said the leader brandishing his spear.

"ENGLISH!" roared Mami. "DO-YOU-SPEAK-ENGLISH?"

"No," he doesn't said another. He looked about the age of a teenager. "But I do."

Mami looked at him.

"What's your name boy?" she asked.

"Don't call me boy!" snarled the boy. "I'm 16 years old."

"Okay," said Mami. "What's your name sixteen year old boy."

"My name is play nice or my brothers and I will shove our spears up your porthole!" he retorted.

Mami looked at him.

"That's a long name," she said. "Can you shorten it?"

The boy looked at her incredulously.

"What do you want?" he asked.

He decided that asking simple questions would be a quick and easy way of dealing this problem.

"I want to know your name," replied Mami.

"You crashed your ship on our island just to know my name," replied the boy. "I'm privileged."

"Crashed my ship..." continued Mami. "What do you mean?"

"You and your crew crashed your ship on our island," said the boy in plain simple English.

"What?" asked Mami. "Why would we do that?"

She turned to Tomomi.

"Why did we crash our ship on the island?" she asked.

"I have no idea," said Tomomi. "Ask your navigator."

"HARUNA ONO!" yelled Mami.

Haruna dashed out of the ship.

"You called," she said at once.

"Why have we crashed the ship into this island?" asked Mami, trying to keep her voice calm.

"We've crashed?" asked Haruna.

"These lovely spear wielding people have kindly informed me that we have crashed into their island," said Mami in a tone of mock formality.

Haruna looked over the side of the ship.

"Oh yeah," she said in surprise. "That's odd. Last time I checked we were on a course to Australia."

Mami grabbed Haruna and slapped her face with every word she spoke.

"Well you had better go and check your maps hadn't you?" she demanded.

The natives were clearly getting bored with the proceedings.

"Look," said the boy. "We want you off our island. We'll give you until sundown. If you're not gone by then. You will be our sacrifice to the fire god."

"How am I supposed to free this ship?" asked Mami.

"You're sailors," he said. "You figure it out."

They turned to leave.

"Pirates!" called Mami. "We're not sailors. We're Pirates!"

They ignored her and continued to walk away. Shaking her head Mami grabbed a nearby shovel. She then climbed down the ship with difficulty and began digging in the sand around the ship.

"Don't just stand there," she called. "Help me!"

A-Chan, Nocchi and Tomomi grabbed the three remaining shovels and jumped to help her. The rest used their hands to dig furiously.

The day was swelteringly hot. Beads of sweat ran down all of the girls foreheads. The day passed quickly and soon sundown was upon them. The Natives reappeared, all brandishing their spears.

"We gave you until sundown," said the boy. "Why are you still here?"

He looked at the beach. There were deep holes around the keel of the ship.

"We couldn't finish in time," replied Tomomi. "Not enough people see."

"Fine," said the boy. "Then you will die."

They all raised their spears.

"Wait!" called Tomomi as Mami drew her sword. "We can help each other."

The natives lowered their spears a little.

"How?" asked the boy.

"Well," she said. "You and your brothers can push us off the beach and we can sail away and never come back to your island again."

He looked at her for a moment.

"Fine," he said.

The natives dropped their spears and ran to the ship. The girls climbed on board the ship and took their places.

Mami scrambled up to the helm. A-Chan and Nocchi began opening the sails. Kashiyuka climbed onto the crows nest. Meanwhile Tomomi, Rina and Haruna were helping the natives push the ship from the beach. They heaved and heaved. After much effort, the ship came free and splashed into the water. They kept pushing, until they were all waist deep in water. At last the ship could float for itself. The three girls scrambled aboard and the natives ran ashore.

"Quick!" urged Haruna. "Let's get out of here!"

Mami turned the helm to starboard, the fastest way to turn away from the island. Nocchi and A-Chan moved the sails to allow them more speed. Slowly, the ship turned away from the island and out to the open ocean.

"Well," said Haruna. "That was close."

Mami sighed.

"Now, can we get to Australia?" asked Mami.

Haruna placed her rear admirals hat on her head and consulted her maps. Her expression changed instantly. She was horrified. She was reading the map upside down! She turned it over to find that the island they had just left was a place called "Borneo."

"We need to sail South," said Haruna looking at the compass. Mami nodded and turned the ship in a southerly direction.

"I feel like Columbus," said Mami.

"What do you mean?" asked Haruna. "Your hat?"

Mami touched her Captains hat.

"No," said Mami. "My hat is lovely."

"Lovely hat!" repeated her parrot.

"Thanks Steve!" said Mami to her parrot.

"Columbus got lost. He was looking for India and found America."

"Were there a bunch of natives waiting for him on the beach?" asked Haruna.

"So the story goes," said Mami squinting into the distance.

"I wonder if there's a bunch of Aussie's waiting on the beach for us to arrive?" wondered Haruna.

It was the middle of the day. The sun was scorching. A group of dark skinned people sat on a beach. They were looking out to sea, almost as if they were expecting something or someone.

"Have they arrived yet?" asked a man with a strong Australian accent.

Another looked at a small sundial on his wrist. Almost like a watch.

"No," he said. "They're late."

He too had a strong Australian accent.

"Damn Sailors!" he cursed.


End file.
